We
seem to live in a world where anything and everything can be considered controversial.
Where there is an opinion, someone can hatch an argument out of it. All a
person needs is a little time to sit on an idea before it produces enough heat
to crack out of its shell and start pecking and chirping away into vexation. It
is not to say that all opinions hold any kind of indignation to any or all
persons whom may hold a difference in opinion, but too much of a push will
always receive something in return. In today’s society, personal views are
under attack even while we live in a “free” society, where we pride ourselves
upon the first amendment of the Constitution of the United States of America. Although
it seems silly that we still have equality issues over two centuries after the
starting of an independent nation of supposed equal opportunities, it is also
perturbing that values are under such pillory as well. We all have the right to
have personal views, lifestyles and rights to religion, politics and even sexual
orientation. After all, shouldn’t we know what is best for our own individual selves
than for someone else to say who we can be, what we can do, when we can do it,
why we cannot or how we should act or live?
When
asked about personal views we tend to hold back the most controversial to avoid
argument or to protect ourselves. Too often, we find ourselves skipping
important events, open conversations in person or on social media, and even
family get-togethers in attempt to keep from stepping into an exchange about
something some may find arbitrary. Because someone may have a more biased view
on either side of an issue does not mean it is any more wrong, unjust or less
valuable to them than the ones we hold so dear. It does not mean that they are
a bigot, racist, sexist or are prejudice in anyway; it just means they have
values and opinions that differ. Do they not all hold as much of a right to
freedom of speech, view or expression as others? Values are values no matter
what the view or who holds it. To tell someone how to think is indeed limiting
his or her freedoms just as much as another who says how one should live, what
they should think or what they should believe. We as a whole society seem to
coast too comfortably in this river of hypocrisy to realize that our own raft
is bottoming out in the shallow water.
As
limitless as an argument can be about what is or is not acceptable, we find
ourselves falling victim to scrutiny on
all forefronts of society. Why should one dictate how another chooses their way
of life? The “land of the free and home of the brave” should not have a limit
to its reference or definition by only pertaining to those who fight in
malicious wars, but also for those who stand up for their belief against all
who may point, spit or snarl. We all live and learn to believe that we can be
anything we want to be, and we should never stop teaching that. But when we start
teaching people that he or she can be anyone or do anything only if it does not
affect someone else’s view, then we are traveling down the wrong road. Our only
limitations should be those we put on ourselves, not what others decide are
acceptable for them.
Gender
equality is just as much of a perpetuating fight today as it was when Abigail Adams
infamously wrote “Remember the ladies” in her letter to her husband, the second
president of the United States of America, John Adams, while he was away
addressing political matters in Philadelphia, PA. The idea that women did not
have as much of a value in society as their male counterparts was an undeniable
oversight in American history. And many countries in the world today still view
women as property. Abigail Adams’ influence on her husband’s accomplishments
brought much leeway for future arguments for women’s rights and responsibilities
in America, although her views of equality were not in the modern sense. But
justifiably so, she believed that “the passion for Liberty cannot be equally
strong in the breasts of those who have been accustomed to deprive their fellow
creatures of theirs.” [1]
In
the continuing battle of gender equality today, women, and anyone of any race,
creed, color or gender for that matter, should not be limited in their wants,
needs or desires in employment, lifestyle or value in society. They should not
be limited in wages or the opportunities for jobs or careers that allows them
to be competitive. Women who may want to become the President of the United States,
for example, should have the right to achieve their goal based solely on their political
achievements rather than gender overshadowing their abilities.
But
are we devaluing motherhood in search for women’s equal rights and
opportunities? It no longer appears to be acceptable for a woman to be proud of
being a mother. To be a proud mother these days comes with the accusations or shame
of limiting herself to the portrayal or depiction of what a woman can also be-
a successful, proud, loving mother who raises her children instead of pursuing
a career. Sadly, in today’s egocentric society, there can be no content or pride
in being a loving mother in the midst of all the feministic views. A woman who
prefers to be a homemaker or stay-at-home wife or mother should have the same
rights to personal preferences in lifestyle as those who choose the career
path, but many women these days feel the pressure to work out of the home.
There
is the idea that while anyone protests against something important to him or
her in today’s heterogeneous America, all who may fit the profile or visual
description of those in protest must join the cause or suffer self-righteous,
hypocritical discrimination from activists. Just as a black man can be labeled
an “Uncle Tom,” a woman can be called an “antifeminist troll.” Why is it wrong
when a woman prefers to raise her children at home instead of pursuing a
career? She should not be considered an antifeminist or victim of women
suffrage but rather, simply, a woman who is proud to be a mother. Her values
are just as strong and deserve to be as valuable as anyone else’s that may
oppose such a preference.
This
country is diverse in many interesting and fascinating ways. Cultural
differences, race and lifestyles differ throughout the U.S. It is what makes
this country so wonderful to live in. No two people are the same, and neither
are their values. The values we each hold have shaped who we are and who we
become. Sometimes our values, beliefs or lifestyles change over time. Sometimes
what we consider good or bad values can change, as well. And how can we
determine what should be a good value to anyone other than ourselves? Only we
can know. If a woman wants to work, let her work, and the same for a woman
wants to stay at home with her children. The prejudices in the world should not
push our pride too far to shift what we consider our own personal values. They are
our foundation to which we build on, and no one should be able to tell another
what should be important to them. Their values, goals, achievements and
lifestyle choices are between them and God. When did it become
customary to judge someone on his or her values and beliefs just because it
differs from another’s? Is that not hypocrisy? “For with what judgment ye
judge, ye shall be judged; and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured
to you again.”[2]
